Beautiful you are, you mean the world to me -
More than anything
Girl my life depends on you wanting me -
Just to feel and taste
Your love, is the sweetest I’ve ever known -
Your touch, is the warmest to my heart -
My heart, it all starts with you -
It feels like heaven -
‘Cause all that i have is all that I give -
Beautiful
- Marques Houston - Beautiful

I just wanted to quote that part of the song - I really like it. How has everyone’s week been? Mine’s been loooong. I worked until 10pm Tuesday through Friday. I’ve got today and tomorrow off, but then I’ve got to work until 10pm again on Monday. It’s not that I mind closing…I get an hour to work on stuff without customers (store closes at 9), but by the time I get home my feet hurt and I just want to go to bed. I’m so lazy! Work has been going really well though, so that’s good news. I’ve got a lot of hours scheduled, but it’s good for me (and my bank account). Speaking of that, I recently found out my parents aren’t really going to be helping me with school anymore. It really sucks because even though my other sister dropped out of college because she was failing, they still paid for her college while she attended. I haven’t failed anything and this is what happens. They can’t really help it though, but I just wish my mother wasn’t so cold about it. She acts like I should be able to pay a few thousand every four months while working part time in retail (which does not pay the best, I might add). I don’t even make three thousand in 4 months! She’s just not very compassionate about it, even though I’ve earned pretty good grades and am almost done with my two-year degree. I wish my counselor hadn’t fked up when he was figuring my stuff out. All this crap for 1 lousy credit. $620 is my bill for one 4-credit Biology class, which will transfer, so it’s not a complete waste. It’s just going to take me that much longer to get my 4-year degree, if I can even pay for it. We’ll see.

On a happy note, N is ENGAGED! She’s getting married August 16, 2008 and I’m her maid-of-honor! The only downer to this is that because she was short on bridesmaids, Amy is going to be one of them. But it’s not my wedding so it’s okay. I swear if she tries to hit me I’ll kick her ass.

Anyway, I’ve got a hot date tonight so I’d better get going…so much to do on my days off! I hope you all have a fantastic weekend!

Yesterday was my family reuinion that my mom’s side holds every year about this time. So JN, his son, and I went up there together. He was nice enough to drive (mainly because his car is better - ) and we spent the day with my family at my aunt’s house on a lake. It was fantastic! It was like a really nice vacation with all of my favorite people. JN and his son had a great time and they also went out on the boat for his son’s first time! My family was so great about it and everyone had fun. Since I was out in my swimsuit, I sort of had to inform my mother that I got my navel pierced for my birthday in February. She wasn’t happy, but she didn’t get all upset either. It really helps that my two sisters have theirs done.

Today JN, his son, and I are going to JN’s parent’s house. They’re really nice people so I’m sure we’ll have fun. I just wanted to pop on quick to talk about our great weekend! Hope you all are having a good time, too!

I’ve never thought of myself as closed-minded, but I always feel a little silly when I realize that something was not as simple as I once thought. Every so often, I see something from a completely different perspective and I start to see how truly unfair life can be. I know it’s no surprise that life doesn’t always go the way you want it to, but when it’s so completely twisted to the point that there is literally nothing you can do, it’s almost too much for a stubborn optimist to bear. When I see someone I care about in such a situation, it angers and saddens me. I’m angered by the fact that there is nothing I can do to fix it and therefore saddened by the feeling of defeat. I’ve been a strong believer in the words, “You live the life you choose to.” However, I’m finding those words more and more difficult to live by. I honestly don’t think people understand how much their actions effect others or how incredibly heartless they can be.

I guess all I’m saying is that life can really suck sometimes. I know, real deep, aren’t I? But as much as I’m not a big “religion-pusher” on other people, I will say right now that it can be amazingly relieving to be able to pray for a miracle and know that it does have a possibility of happening. So that’s what I’m doing: Praying for a miracle. There will be stressful times, rough times, and painful times, but there will also be wonderful times. And with any luck, they’ll last a lot longer than anything else. All I know is that if you manage to find yourself someone to keep you company through all of those times, through thick and thin, you’ll be okay. If I can do nothing else to fix things, I’ll stick it out with you. I’ll be there no matter what.

Because that’s what love really means.

I haven’t written in over a month! Holy crap. I’m such a bad blogger these days. I’m constantly with my not-so-new beau and I’m hardly ever home at a decent time to write. I need a laptop that I can take with me to his place, which is where I have been spending most of my time. I also got another job at Pier 1 Imports, which I absolutely love! I’m still working at the bridal shop, but not as much as I was. I’m itching to quit, but I’m waiting for a certain job offer to be confirmed. One of my managers at Pier 1 told me she’s thinking about getting back into the wedding planning business and was wondering if I was interested. I would totally take the job and quit the bridal shop in a heartbeat, but she hasn’t decided if she wants to go into it yet. Until she decides, I’m just waiting. The only problem is that I have a schedule conflict (three, actually) next week and I don’t know what to do about it. I’d rather work at Pier 1 than the bridal shop because my boss is a psycho, but I can’t go on Pier 1 checks alone (not enough hours). So I’m going to make up new availabilities for both and they’ll just have to deal with it. I’m not going to get so stressed about my stupid job. If I end up with a lot of 10am-10pm days, then so be it. I’m making sure I’ll get at least one hour or more in between though. I quit the bridal shop. She was a complete bitch about it, but it’s done. I’m so relieved!

I’m head over heels for my new man! He’s so awesome. The ex business is completely done and I haven’t heard from him in a long time. My guys and I are so in love it’s disgusting. We are the couple that can’t get enough of each other. The couple that cries when we’re not going to see each other for more than 24 hours. He treats me exactly how I want to be treated and does everything just the way I’ve always wished it would be. It’s insane. I’m so scared that something’s going to go wrong, but it’s been almost 3 months and it’s still perfect. Yeah, we’ve argued about a few things, but we’ve never really fought or gotten really angry. He’s so damn sweet and we make each other so friggin’ happy! Oh I have to stop gushing…I’m sure I’ve got people wanting to puke already.

I’ll try to write again soon. Sorry it’s been so long. I’ve missed writing. I’ve forgotten how good it feels.